Abstinence
By definition, abstinence is the act or practice
of abstaining from a particular practice or activity; voluntary
forbearance of action, or refraining from customary gratitications.
Abstinence comes in many forms and can have profound effects
for those that have the motivation and determination to honor
their decision. If an individual is a vegetarian, they are
consciously choosing to abstain from eating meat. Recovering
alcoholics abstain from indulging in alcoholic beverages and
those with a history of skin cancer choose to avoid or abstain
from prolonged exposure to the sun. However, perhaps the most
significant form of abstinence in today's society is that
of sexual abstinence. As a teenager, it is my choice to remain
sexually pure for I have made the promise to not only myself,
but to my parents, my church family, peers, and to whomever
my future mate will be. This is probably one of the most important
decisions I will ever make in my life and I have the courage
and conviction needed to honor the promises that have been
made.
A recent report published by the Adolescent
Pregnancy Prevention Coalition of North Carolina indicates
that 49 teenagers become pregnant everyday. In 2001-02, teen
pregnancy cost the state of North Carolina and its' taxpayers
in excess of one million dollars with regard to WIC, Medicaid,
TANF, and food stamp needs. In 2003,17,390 girls, ages 10-19,
became pregnant in North Carolina with 312 of that number
occurring in Wayne County. By 2004, the total number of teen
pregnancies had risen to over 18,000 state-wide with an increase
in Wayne County of 2 3 additional pregnancies over the 2003
statistics. Sadly, Wayne County currently ranks 21st` in the
state for the highest number of teen pregnancies and even
sadder is that North Carolina has the ninth highest rate of
teen pregnancy in the United States.
President George Bush was quoted in the Washington
Post in July 30, 2001 as saying, "Abstinence is not just about
saying "no", but about saying "yes" to a happier, healthy
future. I believe that this is a fundamental truth that must
be imparted to teens nationwide if we are to ever stem the
tide of teen promiscuity and pregnancies. Statistics related
to teen sexuality are astounding, not encouraging, and they
are as varied as colors in the rainbow.
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
estimates that there are more than 65 million people living
with incurable sexually transmitted diseases in our country
today. In excess of one million Americans are currently infected
with HIV/AIDS and coupled with that is the knowledge that
approximately 20% of those individuals are unaware that they
have become infected. It has been estimated that one-fourth
of all sexually transmitted diseases occur among teenagers.
These statistics alone should cause alarm among adults and
teenagers alike.
Unfortunately though. the nightmare continues
with sexually active girls being three times more likely to
commit suicide than those that have practiced abstinence.
Among teenage boys, the figures are even more alarming with
sexually active males being ten times more likely to commit
suicide than those that have remained abstinent. Teen sexuality
is directly linked to a high incidence of depression among
youth as well. It is reasonable to assume that this depression
stems from the repeated poor decisions of teens and the consequences
thereof.
For teens, in particular, sexuality is a very
emotional experience and an issue that is best dealt with
as an adult in a committed relationship. Although many teens
aren't able to discern the difference between love and sex,
I know that there truly is a distinct difference. As a Christian,
I know that love is shown in so many forms and usually isn't
even remotely connected to anything physical. I respect the
decision I have made and expect others to show that same respect
toward me and the decision I have made: Those that cannot
are not true friends; they lack the ability to understand
the true meaning of love and obviously have no convictions
of their own to stand them in good stead.
I am fortunate to have been reared in a home
where good decision making skills were the standard expectation.
And when those skills were lacking and poor decisions were
made, I have always been responsible for the consequences
of my actions. Sexual abstinence is a decision I have made
with the help of many friends and family members. With the
abundance of negative outcomes surrounding the sexual activity
of teens today, it is my choice to be sexually abstinent.
In doing so, I am guarding against the loss of a precious
gift that I will one day give to my life partner in marriage.
In doing so, I am preventing the loss of opportunities that
may one day be at my disposal as a healthy, educated young
woman. And, most of all, I am avoiding the issue of broken
promises - promises that have been made to myself, my family,
my friends, and to whomever my future life mate will be. I
am confident that this is the right decision and I have the
courage and conviction to see it through.
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